Nine months ago I set up my company in the UK, those nine months have meant this blog has been shamefully neglected again. Energies that go into writing have been channelled into presentation documents and my other business blog. Just the thought of having no creative outlet makes me icky and sad. I take a sense of pride that last year, that I decided to say goodbye to the advertising agency I was working at and go out on my own with a new business concept during our country's biggest recession. Everyone tells you it's tough starting your own business but I couldn't have had more things stacked up against me if I tried. You nod your head in empathy and prepare as much as you can for the following months that lie ahead, but until you lodge your business name, open up a business bank account and go through the first few months of looking for work, nothing really prepares you for the reality of starting up on your own. It's tough. I suddenly empathise with new mothers when they talk about being overwhelmed, never having enough time, the feeling of total isolation and exhaustion, and having a non-existent social life. I suppose I should be grateful my genitals aren't involved in the process too.
Motivation is just as hard to drum up as new business. You say goodbye to a regular bank balance and say hello to self-doubt and random sleeping patterns. It's a challenging time that as a businessman you can't admit reduces you to tears on occasion as that would be weak and unprofessional. Despite all of this, it has also been one of the most incredibly liberating and satisfying periods of my life and I couldn't imagine it any other way. I've had some incredibly generous and kind support and wise advice since December by some wonderful individuals and cannot express how thankful I am and how important it has been to have those people and friends and family who have been very patient and believed in me. I hope I can do it justice and get through the rest of the year and succeed and grow.
I want to renew this blog and give a new purpose and start being creative by choosing moments of my life to talk about and perhaps topical subjects that are going on in the world so we can all try to learn something from a small sense of retrospective analysis by yours truly. As wanky as that sounds and however this develops, it will be darn sight better than consistently apologising for not writing in a blog every five months. I'm working on some ideas so watch this space.